Feats of Strength and Endurance

If you have a toddler or have ever cared for a toddler - or even just observed a toddler - you know they are crazy unending founts of energy. As a mother of a 'busy' child, I more than fully understand the phrase 'run ragged'.

A while back I was chasing my monkey around and was thinking there should be some kind of official competition for moms. Especially since it seems that every playgroup/family gathering/et cetera has some mom who seems to completely have her poop together.

I want to see HER under pressure.

I want to put a bunch of moms in a competition and make them actually PROVE their parenting prowess.

This matching of wits and wrangling shall be called - wait for it - the Mamalympics.

Some potential events?

- Getting toys out of packaging. There is a special place in hell for whoever is responsible for twisting for all five hundred of those little ties in those Little People sets. Necessary? Really? As my cousin's wife called said, it must be a prison job.

- Carrying a diaper bag, all the groceries and a child all at once. Whoever can get everything from the car to the house in one trip wins.

- Eating dinner while simultaneously doing ninja hands to protect your food. No distracting child with a sticker book or a favorite tv show. The evening news must be on the television.

- Diaper change for speed and accuracy. Children will be fed a fiber heavy diet prior to this event. A pee pee only diaper is an instant disqualification.

- Cleaning the entire house during nap time. Two hours to clean as much as you can, laundry, prep dinner, crochet. Or, you can sit on your computer like I do.

What would your event be in the Mamalympics?


april said...

Shoot. I can't compete since I don't have a kid. Maybe you need an event for awesome aunts like myself.

Heather D said...

You can still compete. You have lots of contact with your nephew, right?

ZDub said...

I would get a big fat FAIL in the Mom Olympics. I send my kids downstairs to my Mom's when I need to get something done.

I'm a loser.

Heather D said...

Yeah, I would not win anything except if there's an award for teaching your toddler (accidentally) to say naughty words.

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

Snot sucking. I am a CHAMP at snot sucking. It is a skill that has taken me many years to hone.

(With the blue bulb, mind you. I feel the need to clarify.)