Spring, Ya'll

Spring...courtesy of Leakey, Texas.

And Fredericksburg, Texas!


Happy Spring, ya'll! It's freezing up here in Washington, but gall darn is it beeyootiful down in the Texas hill country!

For more Spring, mosey on over to You Capture at Beth's place.

No Axe Murderers Here. (Texas, Day One)

If you'd have told me a few years ago that I'd meet a bunch of people online and eventually travel halfway across the country, by myself, to meet them all? I would have laughed in your face. Heartily.

Especially because I'd made a hell of a lot of fun of my poor brother in law when he was in the wedding of a couple he'd met online playing World of Warcraft (okay, that is still pretty high-larious).

So Friday morning, when my husband dropped me off at the airport, his concern was almost palpable. But, I assured him, I have pretty good intuition. And every bone in my body told me that I needed to go. To Texas. To B.F.E. Texas. Where there was no cell phone reception. I told him that if they were all axe murderers, it was like the most elaborate axe murdering plot in all the history of axe murderers and I had to go because it was that good. He didn't think that was so funny.

I sat in the airport, nervous, but so excited - giddy, even. My flight was delayed. And the asshole who checks your boarding pass made me check my carry on. It wasn't too big, there were just a bunch of other assholes who took their TOO BIG carry ons onto the plane and I think he thought I wouldn't put up a fight. I barely avoided a Meet the Parents situation (bomb bomb bomb bombbomb bomb bomb bomb). But after six hours at an airport or on a plane, I was there.

Lisa met me at the Austin airport. We loaded my luggage into the 'minivan that can' and off we went to San Antonio, chatting the whole way like we've known each other forever. And we met these hookers for dinner.

Clockwise from left: Christy, Lisa, Amanda, Me, Tiffany, Kirsten, Thea (OMG, I just realized Elaine is not in the photo...she must have taken it.)

I'm pretty sure I had the best fajitas I have ever had in my entire life. Did you know that they put melted garlic butter on their tortillas in Texas? True story. Manna from Heaven.

And there was a mariachi band. Unfortunately they were only playing sad mariachi music. It was kind of pissing me off.

We rolled ourselves out of the restaurant and took off on the two hour trek to Christy's in the hill country. Leakey, to be exact. After following the wrong black Tahoe for a bit, we were finally headed in the right direction.

And, I witnessed the most amazing thunder and lightening storm I've ever seen. Crazy. CRAZY. Kudos to Lisa and the minivan that can for delivering us safely to the banks for the Frio River.

Our long anticipated Hooker Retreat 2010 weekend had officially begun...

Yippee Kay Aye!

Okay, I'm tired, and my son is really wanting my attention.

And I missed him SO MUCH, so I love that he wants to cuddle. LOVE.

But, quickly, here are a few quick takes from my trip to Texas. And trust me, there are lots of stories to be told and photos to show... be patient. They will come. Trust.

For now:

My first glimpse of Texas.

I got to stay here! I don't think it gets more beautiful, for reals.

There was a haircut. With kitchen shears.


And I think I may die if I do not obtain one of these for my living room.


I'm not kidding. I'm on eBay right now.

Daddies + Sidewalk Chalk =

Cute, possibly innappropriate chalk body outlines on patio.


It was a massacre. Person, dog (I think) and cat.

At least I intervened before they became, ahem, anatomically correct...

Dear Nick Junior nee Noggin

Does anybody out there watch Jack's Big Music Show? Anybody? Bueller? Bueller? *crickets*

Well, my son is OBSESSED with Jack, his dog, Mel and his 'super swell friend', Mary. Or, as he says, JACKMELMARYANDMEL! Most of his words and phrases seem to stem from this lovely little show on Nick Jr. (formerly Noggin). We only let him watch it once, maybe twice a day (on THOSE days). But there are only about 25 episodes total, so he's seen them all multiple times.

The show was canceled a few years back - I seriously don't know why they don't bring it back. In my opinion, it's probably one of the most innovative and educational shows (as far as music goes) out there for toddlers. Bonus - it's parent friendly. I honestly don't mind it at all. And that's saying a lot.

Jack's Big Music Show is basically a puppet show, focused on music (duh) - with a couple of kid friendly music videos thrown in, and sometimes a guest. Jon Stewart did an episode. And Lisa Loeb has been on it too (oh 1995, how I miss thee!).

Yeah, it's cool. I'll admit it. I kind of love it.

Except for these musical guests. I find them, well, disturbing.



I did a little research and found out this group is called The Trachtenburg Family Slide Show Players (and yes, they are a family - dad, mom and daughter) and they're from Seattle OF COURSE THEY ARE . While they have an interesting thing going - the slides they show are randoms they pick up at garage and estate sales and flea markets - I TOTALLY CANNOT GET OVER THAT GUY'S MUSTACHE. There I said it. I'm shallow. Get over it.

ANYhow.

What I really want to know is why Jack's Big Music Show was canceled? Can someone please get their shiz together and bring it back?

Cause if my alternatives are The Upside Down Show and Wow Wow Wubzy and Lazytown (okay, maybe Sportacus is kind of hot if you can get past the pencil thin mustache...yes, I have mustache issues) I might need to pop someone in the nose.

Hoarders: Accessory Edition

It started about a month ago. I was up visiting a friend in Bellingham (My hometown - or the largest town nearby to where I grew up. Also known as the city of subdued excitement. I'm not kidding) and after we got our hairs did, we had a nice little lunch and ended up doing some shopping.

We were in this adorable, trendy little shop and I was feeling terribly old. And out of style. I decided then and there I needed to update myself somehow. And that somehow was accessorizing.

Truth be told, I suck at accessorizing. I have my ears pierced, twice, yet I never wear earrings. I had a brief tryst with necklaces that came to an abrupt halt when I realized that I didn't want to be strangled by my toddler while trying to be fashionable. I will not wear watches or bracelets because they make my wrists look weird...in particular, they bring attention to my hairy arms (I am convinced they are so hairy because I tried to shave them once when I was 7).

So basically the only accessory I wear regularly is my wedding ring.

For some reason, that afternoon, a little voice in my head said YOU MUST START WEARING SCARVES.

And so it began. Introducing my first scarf.

Hi, I'm a dork. That is all.

Since then, I've kind of lost the plot. Old Navy has reasonable, super cute scarves and I can't seem to control myself. Like, at all.

Last count I was at twelve.

Intervention, please?